Tag Archive for: happiness

Savor Cotton Candy Moments

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“There were no words left, we’d said them all.” – Carrie Bradshaw, Sex & The City 

This line is iconic if you’re a fan of the show. You’ll remember it well as the time that Carrie and Mr. Big broke up for what we all thought was the last time. It was painful and powerful. It’s when she realized their relationship was really over. 

Now I look at these words with new meaning. 

Sadly, on October 16, 2025 at 3:21pm ET my dear best friend and soul sister, Nicole Feldman died. 

Nothing went unsaid between us. 

Nicole fought various cancers for more than five years. She beat each one time and again. Even the doctors were stunned. Until she couldn’t anymore. She battled breast (2020), cervical (2022), pancreatic (2023), and finally metastasized pancreatic cancer to the abdominal wall (2024 – 2025).

Nicole and I went to college together, lost touch for nine years and randomly ran into each other when Eataly in NYC opened! What a wonderful moment! We’ve been super close ever since – and luckily our husbands get along and love the same music so we’ve traveled all over the world together.  

This picture is from Sorrento in October 1, 2024 – nearly one year to the day before Nicole died. We visited the Amalfi coast together in 2013 and vowed to return because we went in March, which is not the best time because of the weather! We got there 11 years later. We’re wearing matching earrings. The earrings I had picked for “Nicole’s Virtual Hug Club.” It’s a group I put together when she was going through her third round of chemo to support her. It was a WhatsApp group with special women in her life who all wore the same earrings to bring her luck and healing with each chemo treatment. 

I’m fortunate that I went to LA to spend time with her and her husband Peter weeks before she had to leave us. She was hurting and struggling but we still managed to have fun in between. We captured some “cotton candy moments” that were so sweet and fleeted too quickly.

I told her we are in the “Cotton Candy Time.” 

Just like cotton candy, we grabbed the sweet pieces when we could and we savored them because they melted away quickly. It helped us to stay in the moment and enjoy each other during what we knew would be our final times together.

This trip to LA was difficult but also rewarding. Her body was shutting down right in front of us and we refused to admit defeat. But we both knew. I asked her questions about her life and what she wanted to happen after she died. It was a gift that we are both planners and could really rifle through a checklist together. 

I got to be helpful to her and her husband at a time when nothing makes sense. I made lists and helped to organize her medications. With the help of my dear friend Sharon, who is a functional medicine health coach, we reworked Nicole’s eating schedule and foods she could digest more easily. 

Nicole and I turned it into a game. She has always been a foodie and a fan of any show about high-end cuisine like The Bear. We used all the industry terms for her meals like “amuse bouche” for her snacks, and “hands” when the food was ready to be served. 

There were times when she was too sleepy to talk and others when she was directing me how to fold a fitted sheet while laying in bed! She even showed me how to do a proper plie squat! She was a ballerina once. 

We watched her favorite daytime television show, The Price Is Right! She got to be a contestant on the show twice and was a very enthusiastic contestant! She never made it to the Plinko game though, which would have been amazing. 

We watched The Kelly Clarkson Show and Alanis Morrisette was the guest. We’ve always loved her. I got us tickets to see her a few summers ago and Nicole couldn’t go because of a work thing. I was always sad we didn’t get to see her together. But this was better – it was a private concert just for us with our favorite songs.  

We even got to watch Dirty Dancing, one of our all time favorite movies, one more time together. We danced (in bed) and sang too. And laughed. We laughed so much. So with all the sadness there was also sweetness. But it faded and went fast. 

I hope the cotton candy image sticks with you and you remember to savor the good wherever you are. Take the trip. Make the call. Do the thing. This is what Nicole would always say. And she’s right. You never know what tomorrow will bring. 

Before she died, I asked her how I would know she’s visiting me. She said she’ll come back as a butterfly. And wouldn’t you believe it…I have been seeing them everywhere! I know she’s with me and I savor the cotton candy moments we still share. 

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Reflect and Reset List

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This year had so many ups and downs for me. There was a lot to celebrate and be grateful for, and some hard moments too. 

I’ve been thinking about how to move into 2026 holding these memories close, while also making room for new opportunities that I’m really excited about. That’s where I got the idea for a Reflect and Reset List. 

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How to Use Play to Be More Productive

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Play and work seem at first like they are at odds. Play is what distracts you from working. Right?

Actually… it’s a little more complicated. It turns out that play can be a productivity tool! 

Incorporating play into your routines is a powerful way to get more done and feel less stressed. 

I’ve been intentionally adding play into my day and it’s true. The benefits are unexpected and bring me so much joy!

And science backs it up. According to research, play is essential for our physical and cognitive health.

Here’s how you can use play to be more productive:

1) Use play to rest.

I’m a huge fan of rest — that’s why my mantra is “rest is the new hustle.” Without rest, it’s so easy to get burned out.

I learned this lesson the hard way years ago, when my appendix burst and I waited too long to go to the hospital. I had to spend weeks in recovery because I didn’t listen when my body told me I needed to dial things back. Ever since then, I‘ve been shouting from the rooftops that rest is essential for working towards your goals.

But it’s less clear what “rest” actually looks like. You might not feel like laying down and taking a physical break — but you still need to rest. And that’s where play comes in. 

Playing to rest looks different for everyone – it might be taking care of a little virtual bird on the Finch app, trying out a new recipe, or doing a crossword puzzle. What matters is that it’s creative, energizing, and yes — FUN!

2) Use play to get re-inspired.

Feeling stuck is one of the biggest productivity pitfalls. Whether you’re not sure of the next step on a big project or you have writer’s block, uncertainty and a lack of creativity can make your goals feel impossible to accomplish. 

And inspiration isn’t just something you can buckle down and force into being. That’s why it’s so essential to get out of your own head, lighten up, and change your perspective.

I love using play to get the creative juices flowing. Play can help you feel inspired and ready to dive back in with renewed energy.

Here’s some ideas:

One of my favorite ways to play is pulling tarot cards (I’m even getting my Tarot Reader Certificate!). I love it so much that I wrote a whole blog about it. The idea really resonated with people. I was thrilled to see comments on LinkedIn from people who are keen to try using tarot to boost their creative inspiration.

You might consider painting, dancing, or even doing a puzzle. All of these can help you see things from a new perspective, break out of your regular habits, and feel connected to your creative energy!

My friend Karen Bussen hosts free online creativity meet-ups called Le Salon. I’ve been and really enjoyed them! If this sounds like something you’d enjoy, check out Le Salon here. 

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3) Use play to motivate yourself.

I’ve started rewarding myself with a few minutes of play each time I finish a task. And sometimes dangling that carrot is all you need to power through!

If you find yourself getting distracted, it can be helpful to use play as a motivator. For example, I commit to finishing a task and then I’ll play Connections in the New York Times Games app. I’ve also gotten into building my own town in the Township app. 

If you feel stuck on what kinds of play activities are right for you, you can check out the Play Personalities quiz based on Dr. Stuart Brown’s research. Dr. Brown speaks regularly about the benefits of play for adults and using his personality quiz can help you discover the best kinds of play for you.

Here’s to fun!

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My Favorite Books of 2022

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In 2023, I want to read more. But “more” isn’t very specific. So I looked up how much I read this year to set a specific goal for myself.

Looking back on your habits and setting new goals in relation to what you’re already doing will help you set realistic goals for yourself. And stick to them throughout the year.

If you’ve never gone rock climbing, you probably won’t climb Mt. Everest in 2023. But you might start going to the rock climbing gym by your house twice a month.

In 2022 I read 22 books! And I’ve compiled my favorites in this list in case your goal is to read more books this year. (Or if you’re just looking for some good recommendations.)

Here are my favorite fiction and nonfiction books I read this year.

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Creating An Empathetic Work Culture

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Feedback gets a bad rap. But you know what? Feedback can be really helpful with your team, your business, or whatever it is that you’re doing. IF you do it the right way.

As a TV producer for many years, we used feedback after every single thing we did. We had a postmortem discussion after every show. We discussed what went well, what did not go well, and what can change (or should stay the same) in the future. And then we incorporated that feedback immediately.

I know not every business can work that way, but it is important to figure out how feedback is going to function at your company so your product is at its best, your team feels involved and the environment feels open and friendly.

Here are my top three tips for making feedback better for employers and employees.

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